Remember. Always keep in mind that no matter what has happened or even what is yet to come while you are together (and your health) then that is what matters. And if you can get away with it in one piece, still together at the end of it, then there’s no doubt you can get through anything.
Don’t rush to blame others. It’s so easy, especially when you’re frustrated and suffering under stress, to start pointing fingers. It’s human nature and for one reason or another we think it makes us feel better, at the end of the day it doesn’t do anyone any good, including yourself. From your partners’ point of view, you have to think that blaming them is the last thing in the world they want to hear. We all blame each other on the inside anyway, even if we know that’s not true, so before you start taking turns talking, just take a second to think, “How would I feel if we took turns.” was saying that now?
Stay together. One of the best tips for any marriage is to put it all together, there is nothing that you can’t beat while it’s together. It might sound trite and maybe that’s why we don’t all say it out loud, but it’s true nonetheless. The basic idea of a marriage is that you become one unit, two people who are stronger as one unit while they are alone. If you’ve used the trick above and you don’t blame each other for your financial situation, then logically you are already sticking together through it.
Remember your wedding vows, “for better and for worse, for the richest and for the poorest”. When we make these vows to each other, it probably doesn’t occur to us what might happen in the future, but nonetheless we made a promise that we had the best intentions to keep. In times of financial difficulty, these wishes become much more important and necessary. Stick to who you made it to, not because of the promise you made, but because of who you made it to.
Find a solution. While it may not be possible to come up with a comprehensive solution to your money problems, take smaller steps and talk to your spouse to try and sort out less important issues. So instead of sitting down with your head in your hands and wondering how you are going to be doing, start with smaller questions like “How do we manage to pay the next bill”. By not trying to find a way to resolve the big picture, you will increase your frustration and feel like you have more control over your situation and that you are able to slowly get back on your feet.
Laughs. Whenever we face difficult times in any area of our life it is easy to fall into a slump or worse. Laughing to each other will ease the mood, come together, and show each other that there is more to life than just worrying about finances. Make jokes, be silly, make faces, anything that can help relieve the tension you are going to feel.
Control. In every relationship there is always a more dominant and submissive character. When times are tough, try not to take control or let yourself be completely deprived of control. Sometimes it’s easier to bury your head in the sand or release your inner control, but to get through the tough times with your marriage still in tact, try to balance the control as equally as possible between you.
Remember that like everything in life, he will turn around again. Bad luck turns into luck, the poor can turn into rich (or at least become stable again). Always keep in mind that things will bounce back, that it will be difficult, maybe even very difficult, for a while, but eventually they will change.